One thing about me, I take people's words seriously. If it were a statement, or an opinion, true, I won't bluntly believe what they say, but i take them seriously. I'll think about it, and reconsider my own perspectives. That is how I learn. That is how i understand.
But words like that aren't the case for this morning. It's the 'Yes's and 'No's. Agreements. Decisions. I go by them strictly. That's how I work, professionally, that is how I build my own trust towards somebody, personally. And this is something, those who will have me in their life for quite a time, professionally or personally, should know.
Why? For one thing, I may not be a I-know-what-i'll-be-doing-in-10-years kind of person (if you read thru my older posts, you'll know this by HEART now hahah :P), but I am quite the planner for whats to happen the next day, or the next hour, or the next minute. And usually, i keep my itinerary full. If you ask me today, what i'll be doing tomorrow, I can give you a full detailed schedule for it. Make no mistake about that. And so, if you've decided with me to do certain things in the future, and you've agreed to what we've planned, I would expect highly for you to keep to your words. For example, if you're working with me, and you told me you'll be handing in your part to me at 10am thru my e-mail, I'll be waiting for that. I'll make an effort to spare my 10 minutes to go thru my e-mails at that time. If you're my mother, and you told me that you'll be taking me to the grocery store at 2pm, and that it'll only take us 2 hours to do the shopping, i'll be waiting for that, and i'll be waiting for it to end exactly after two hours of doing so. If you're my best friend, and you told me you'll be e-mailing me, or post a blog post, i'll spare and make an effort to check. I'll be waiting. Especially when the words come from those whom I love. So I'll be counting on these words to be fulfilled or else my whole day would be topsy turvy. I can compensate, I can tolerate, and I would always make sure that it wouldn't burden anybody before you truly agree. I would always ask, "Are you sure it'll be okay for you?" or "Are you sure this won't burden you?", I'll make the effort to lessen one's burden.. But the moment you say yes, and the decision HAS been made, I'll take them seriously. That is how i am.
So, that's more on a professional basis. Personally, words give me hope. Words are promises. And words, is my weakness. That's how I can get hurt so badly. By words. And that is how I built bridges of trust, thru words. I don't expect much from people. If you know me in person, or as someone who's close to you, i think its fair for me to say that I can tolerate a lot, and I will tolerate, a lot, especially when it comes to my love ones. So yea, i don't expect you to lavish me with all that you have, to impress me, to do things for me. I don't expect my dad to buy me a car, I don't expect my mom to cook for me when i come home, I don't expect my best friends to buy me things, I don't expect my significant other to put me first before anything else, no. The only thing that I expect highly, would be to keep to your words. And who sets the level of expectation? Not me. You.
So what happens when you dont keep to your words? Simple, you'll frustrate me. You'll hurt me. You'll break me into pieces. Yea, one or two times or three times or four times, i may still handle it. But i'm human, and my heart tires. And you don't want my heart to tire on you if you want me to still be around, happily.. huhu.
So yea, that's one thing about me.
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