I think i have a thing for Vin Diesel

For the past 36 hours, I have managed to take a test where two questions got in my way of getting Vikas’s satisfaction of a full mark, daang I was close! And then I cooked fish curry which def got najwa’s satisfaction and mine lol, had a lovely conversation with a cab driver who’ve stayed in New York City for 21 years, watched Thor, Fast Five, and Insidious, ANDDDDDDD to successfully journeyed myself into a complete state of sleep deprivation. Yup, I’m practically zombified. But hey, it’s Friday, I know I’ll be spending more time with my ponies and rainbows over the weekend, so I’ll get back at it in no time.

A lot of things happened this week though, that when it is time to self-reflect, there’s just too much to reflect on, (to be frank with you, I’m not quite sure what I’ll be writing about just yet. I’m just typing away, and so if the points seem pointless, my baad :P). I was talking to Ojo yesterday, and there was this one particular point where he said he couldn’t understand how people could get depressed. Everything is set for us, God would always be there for us, yet why do people still go through this thing call depression? The moment he mentioned the D word, my mind took a flight of its own to my dark times when I had to go through something alike. My own depression.

Of course, I’m not gonna elaborate on what happened, why, and how I felt and stuff, if you’re interested to know, do browse for my September or October posts last year lol. You’ll get the idea of the gloomy age I had to go through :P But now, months after all of that, and to be reflecting back, all the moments where I thought I was lost, with no direction to go, all of that sparks some kind of sense now. And when Ojo asked why people had to go through depression despite of everything that they still have, there’s one word to it. Purpose.

Everything has a purpose. Allah is wise, He wouldn’t put us through hardships or even good times without purpose. And to be frank with you, being at a state of depression, is an opportunity. As a matter of fact, be it any kind of state. It doesn’t really matter. When you’re happy, or when you’re sad, or when you’re hard working, all of these different situations, offers their own opportunities, and for us to be amongst the opportunities, is our chance to grab it, and that’s the purpose of being there in the first place. I went through depression, and I got something in return. U learned a better understanding of things, a better picture of me. I got a chance to appreciate things that I already have and things that I’m bound to have even more. You wouldn’t get that kind of opportunity to realize such a thing when everything is all happy and wonderful for you.

You know when you’re facing something bad, and you tell other people about it, and they would most probably be saying things like, not to worry, things will be get better soon? Well, after reading the article of how people leave and would they ever return, it stated in there something like, these hardships you face wouldn’t just benefit you in the future, but at that particular moment itself is being beneficial to you . That article, to combine with what I’ve just said previously of how it all had purpose, and how everything holds opportunities, it makes sense.

So where am I getting to with all this? (hahaha here’s the part where things get disoriented :P). I guess I just want to point out that, it is totally fine to be depressed, and that you’ll gain something different in a situation like that, compared to not being depress at all. You’ll see things at a different angle, and that is good for you, like swimming in the deep blue ocean without knowing where to go, that’s how depression feels to me. But hey, if you keep swimming, you’ll be bound to bump into something sooner or later, and it’ll be all worth it. So keep swimming, and don’t give up. Open your eyes while you’re at it, analyze what surrounds you and learn. Every particular moment of life is for you to learn. Even when you’re depressed. Learn from it. Make your time worthwhile.

Ojo said, people get depressed when all hope is lost. I say, people who face depression is at a point of great opportunity to revive and find hope that’ll change their lives. Great hope.

Ps: and yes, Vin Diesel, with his voice and his attitude, is just sooo effin’ HOT!! Biar la nampak tua ke ape ke, hot weyh!! HOT!!!!! Hahahahaha :P oh and kok pei, If you’re reading this, there’s a bunch of Chinese dudes living at the opposite building of ours, anddd they’re quite okay looking lol. Most probably from hong kong or shang hai or somethin’. Not sure if they’re gay though, just wanted you to know lol ;)