One of em random adventures :)

So i woke up one morning, and i told myself..

"I think i'm going to Singapore tomorrow"

Yup, it was that random lol. Told my mom and dad about it, they bought me tickets.. and before you know it, i was on a green bus to Singapore lol! And the best part of it all aside from it being random, was me going ALONE! :P You know how much i love going on these random adventures alone :)

No, i'm not gonna tell you guys exactly what happened in Singapore lol u know i'm not that kind of blogger who puts up posts on what she does on this day, and that day, bla bla bla :P But i am gonna write about what i got in return from the whole trip. Its what they called, perspective :)

It was after buka, when Aiman and i were goofin' around as always. Oh this kid was one hyperactive nut alright. He was climbing on my back, stepping on my feet like 'transformers' or so he claimed hahaha, givin' my hair a bit of style inspired by this bush around the corner of his house perhaps, cozz gurrlllll (or boy if you're one haha :P), it became all bushy alright hahaha.. I was truly drained! lol. But regardless of how exhausted i became, it didn't matter. I love playing with Aiman :)

And so where were we? Ah yes, goofin' around, so we were goofin' around. And all of a sudden, he came up with this guessing game. Its sorta like charades i guess, but its just a one-word thing rather than having to figure out the whole sentence of it. So it was on one of this kid's turn that he took a pillow in one hand, made a fist in the order, and was jumping on sofas in a particular interval.

"Monkey?"

"hhahaha eee mana adee!!"

Crap. i knew i was gonna lose this round hahaha i mean, what could he possibly be if not a monkey? himself? bahahahahaha!! kay kay, joking aiman! lol..

"Kakak Yasmin give up ke?"

"EH noo.. mana ade seyy"

*giggles*

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.......
..............
.........................

"Okay aiman, what on earth are you? lol"

"Org dayak!! uga-uga!"

pffftttt... hahahahaha and that was what lit up this light bulb cap of mine lol. How diverse, creative and observant kids can be, uptil he could think of picking up a pillow and using it as a tool to add a wee bit of detail to what he had to describe. How fast that particular idea came to him was another thing that i was astounded by as well. And i dont think it takes an intelligent 6 year old brain to do that, i think all of us, once upon a time ago was like him. Every detail meant to us a lot, once upon a time ago. Every detail made us eager to understand more. Every detail made us want to relate to everything else that we know.

Unfortunately though, as we grow older, we tend to ignore this gift of ours. Ignorant, we became, and now we're missing out the details. We're missing out the fun to understand things, to WANT to understand things. Instead, we do things just because we have to do them, and WAIT for something to happen to us, to spark that interest again. We've become pathetic. hmm...

I love these random adventures.
These adventures that i go on alone.
It makes me see things.
It makes me see things :)

~Is precious and rare and fleeting

Middle of nowhere
Finally you can breathe
Nobody knows your name
It's easier

Shut your eyes tightly
Clench your fists 'til they almost bleed
Cautiously, lightly
Gently expose what's underneath

And all you feel now
Is the scarlet in the day
Even if it's real
You can't stay...

[Chorus]
So there you go
You're gone for good
There you go
You're gone for good

Your mind is swollen
From months of thought without release
They've taken their toll on you
And this very moment
Of timid and fragile honesty
Is precious and rare and fleeting

And all you feel now
Is the scarlet in the day
And even if it's real
You can't stay...


-- sometimes,
being alone is not that bad,
sometimes,
in times of loneliness
you feel at home..

Conflicted

Sometimes,
when something hits you,
especially for the first time,
you just need time to process it,
you need space to think.

I'm so used to leading my own life,
being in charge,
I'm so used to deciding for myself,
where people just let me be,
leave me with whatever it is that i want to do,
and trust me that at the end of the day,
when i say I'll be alright,
i'll be alright.

But now that i'm sensing a change of scene,
I cant help myself but to be caught off guard,
dumfounded and conflicted,
confused with how to feel,
or how to react to it..

In some ways,
I am well relieved.
I'm tired of leading,
I'm tired of having to be uptight all the time,
And its always soothing to know,
what you do
matters to someone.
regardless of how big,
or small it is..
I guess i'm beyond happy to welcome such a change :)

But i dont want to get use to it,
if its not planning to stay..
I dont want to be blinded by it,
depended on it,
attached to it,
if its leaving me soon.
I can't afford to be vulnerable,
I can't afford to be fragile again,
not out in the open,
for it'll hurt,
like an open wound,
left to dry in a sand storm.
Imagine each sand particle,
scrapping off your bare flesh,
as the wind twirls it deeper,
and deeper into the layers of your skin.
It hurts.
The kind of hurt that'll haunt me forever.
I'm done hurting that way.

Conflicted these uncertainties are making me feel,
and i'm not sure what to make of it just yet.
I hope time is given to me,
for me to reside the infliction.
I hope if i seem reluctant,
patience will be offered.
And if i am to believe in this,
i hope it won't leave me in a dreadful way.

All trust and hopes of mine is to Him,
for He know best for all of us insyaAllah.. :)

The OTHER side of me and one of her rare hellos :P

1. Lights - Ellie Goulding (Bassnectar's remix)



2. Drowning - Armin Van Buuren ft Laura



3. I got nothing but love for you - Axwell



4. Promises - NERO (Skrillex remix)



5. Louder - Katy B

Words

Words.

Words are constructors.
Building bridges between two unlikely things,
two unlikely beings,
two unlikely minds,
two unlikely hearts.
Creating a common interest,
a common understanding.

Words are linkers,
Linking pieces of a puzzle,
To obtain that one big picture,
And to decide what emotions to feel
at a particular given situation,
To be shared with others,
For others to see,
Exactly what you see,
For others to feel,
Exactly what you feel

Words are demolishing.
Destroying and bombing down sturdy monuments,
As if the walls and metal structures were made of paper,
Paper that'll fly away with an unsettling wind,
Like the past didn't mean a thing.

Words are blades,
Blades that are sharp enough to cut confidence into pieces,
Slice dignity into strips of waste,
Puncture souls that bleed forever.
Leaving scars that would take a lifetime to heal,
or maybe more.

Words are keys,
Keys to worlds beyond our own imagination,
Worlds that offer sacred hopes and faith,
Flooring on trust and honesty.
Some of these worlds are only to be reserved for oneself,
Some have their gates open to only certain people with authority.
But who'd known these open gates welcome not only companionship,
But severe vulnerability as well

I've always been amazed by what words can do,
How they could make you feel like the most valuable person in one second,
And all shitty in the next.
How they could move the nation to greater heights,
and then conjure wars among each other.
How they're a giver, giving all hopes that's too tempting to not be infected by it,
Only to crush all them hopes into shards of broken glass for you to step on.
Its like they give you wings to fly,
and then throw a lighting bolt at them once you soar the skies.
Words are capable of doing that alright.
They are so capable of doing that
that sometimes, it makes me feel as if its better to not feel like u're the most valuable person in the first place,
as if its better to not admit that u could reach greater heights,
that its better to not believe in these uncertain hopes,
or perhaps to not fly at all.

As how confident i would use words to share the view from this window of mine,
As how comfortable i am with them when sharing my thoughts and feelings with others,
I'm afraid of giving false hopes,
Words tend to give false hopes.

I'm well terrified to believe in the words that come by themselves to greet me as well,
to invite me for a view from another window.
Im afraid of losing sight of whats real and losing my grip by words,
i've been down that road once,
I wish to never revisit it again.

But you'll never know when you'll be losing sight until you do,
You'll never know when you'll hit rock bottom until you can no longer go any lower,
You'll never know...

Words are keys,
Keys to heaven and hell.
May Allah show me guidance huhu..

~I got my secrets, and you only have the sleeping sun

Climb up your mountain
Nineteen and countin'
You have got seven, I have got one

Blinded and hurtin'
This I'm deserving
I've got my secrets
You've only got the sleeping sun

When you've got a secret
Then you've got to keep it
When you've got a question
Answers will come

Running and hiding
Take and dividing
You've got your secrets
I've only got a sleeping sun

Sleeping Sun
Singing
Oooh um
Ohhhh oh...
Ahhh ahh
Oh oh
Oh oh
Oh ohh

And you, as I, saw
A piece in a jigsaw
Run up and around it and
Jump up real tall.

Run round the houses,
North and the souths'
You've got your answers we've
Only got a sleeping sun.

Sleeping Sun
Singing
Oooh um
Ohhhh oh...
Ahhh ahh
Oh oh
Oh oh
Oh ohh

Flash Dearest.. :)

Your warm whispers
Out of the dark they carry my heart
Your warm whispers
Into the dawn they carry me through
And I'm weeping warm honey and milk
That you stay surrounding me, surrounding me

Your warm whispers
Letting me drown in a pool of you
Your warm whispers
Keeping the noise from breaking through
And I'm weeping warm honey and milk
That you stay surrounding me, surrounding me
Yeah I'm weeping warm honey and milk that you
Stay surround me, surrounding me
Honey stay surrounding me

:)