Peculiar relationship

I wish i could get to know you better,
I wish i could talk to you more,
I wish i could be your bestest friend,
Be the one you adore.

Unfortunately things aren't all candy,
There's a thick wall between us,
A bloody thick wall that has been building itself,
Ever since i could understand your first words

It frustrates me really,
Disappoints me,
and hurts me.
We got time,
We had time,
But we're letting it slip.
Why?

Don't you ever wanna know about me?
Don't you ever feel like you should know?
Wait, i know you do.
I heard you did.
Yet you never made the effort to.
Why?
Am i not worth putting aside all ego?
Am i not an enough reason for you to do so?
Am i just not enough?
huhu

Perhaps it goes both ways,
Perhaps i'm not doing my share as well,
But how shall i,
you never seem to give me the choice.

I'm starting to get use to this though,
I did get use to it once,
Until i learned how much i really need you to be you,
You're the only one that i have,
And so i craved,
I hoped,
But i guess im starting to lose hope,
I'm starting to accept that certain things might not change,
I'm starting to believe that this is how we're meant to be,
I'm starting to get use to it again.

Its not that bad though sometimes,
For i tend to understand you in ways people couldn't,
I tend to defend for you in ways people don't,
And i tend to learn from you things you never really show
Maybe thats my purpose of being with u
Everything has a good side to it,
Thats what i kept on telling myself.

A peculiar relationship,
thats what we share,
Yet regardless of this peculiar relationship,
Regardless of the disappointment i feel i am towards you,
Regardless of whatever that happens after this,
I hope you know that i love you,
and i'll never stop loving you.
And i know it goes both ways.
I hope it does.