Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Ramblings at 1am in the morning

We were in the tissue culture room again, today, and Najwa and I were observing Ojo splitting and seeding cells into the 96 well plates for intracellular calcium test and membrane potential test. There we were, watching live cells being split again and again into different flasks, there we were, witnessing the capability of these cells living on their own, outside of the body, all intact and functioning like the normal pancreatic cells, producing insulin. They were like pets, where we'd have to let them grow and feed them and clear their waste, and what not lol.

And after a moment of starring at the cells, a spark of sense lit up the dark eerie alleys of neuron-ville lol. If these cells can live independently, like this, if we could manage to crack the code of the exact chemistry that happened during gestation to its very last detail, from the moment of fertilization, till the very end which includes cell signalling transduction pathways and stuff, if we manage to replicate the conditions of a mother's womb, supply it with all these different cell lines and the nutrients needed, if all of this is possible, would it then, be possible for us to produce an adult sized human body? Something tells me, we're very much close to that. We've been coming up with in-vitro clones of various animals, organs, and tissues now, have we not?
Nothin' much new there.

But then, regardless of how well we manage to replicate the human body, it would still be an empty vessel, it wouldn't come to life. Which brings us to the heart of the curiosity here, why must it be that way? When one soul enters a body, the body starts to function. It'll come to life. Obviously, logically, with just that example alone, we know our souls emit some kind of energy. But what kind? And why is it gone when its no longer there? How does it disappear? Why must it disappear when the body dysfunctions at a certain level? How does it happen? Why do we need such energy to function a human body, let alone any kind of organism, when the basic building blocks of it (cells) are well and alive? What does it trigger, really? MasyaAllah..

Some say, dgn kuasa Allah, things are as they are just because. Others may say, with science, everything can be explained. Well, i would have to agree with both views. I strongly believe, it is of Allah's will to make things the way it is, butttt not to be left alone like that just for us to gain pleasure from it, instead, they're there for us to figure out, understand, and appreciate His works as well. And one way of achieving such understanding, is through science. I wonder if somewhere in the near future holds the answers to these questions. And if yes, what else would we be able to achieve with the massive information that we've gained?

I'm rather weird in so many ways, i know. I haf all these looney ideas in my mind, that sometimes, i'm just too much up there ya know, that it scares me. I could feel the burning desire of wanting to understand things, of wanting to see different things, of wanting to discover things, raging deep in my heart. Its too strong that sometimes, i feel too overwhelmed by it, that it could even bring me to tears lol. Yea, its pretty much effed up lol. But what isn't nowadays huh? :P

I even question myself sometimes, will i ever find that chance to appreciate a guy and be passionate towards him as passionate as i am towards all this? I feel like theres a huge possibility i might be cheating on whomever with science bahahahah weyyy, bapak nerdy gilaaa aku ni.. but im not kidding. And not only that, would there actually be a guy out there who'd find me as THE one for him after knowing beyond my piano skills, beyond whomever i end up to be, beyond any rankings, or my english accent lol, or my basketball skills, beyond all of that, that i'm just an ordinary, too much of a nerdy, chubby girl, who's heart is so caught up into wanting to see, understand, and discover Allah's creations? lol. It would be one of Allah's miracles to me if there is somebody meant for me, who appreciates me simply for who i am, and not for what i am huhu :)

Yes, i'm just rambling on random thoughts tonight. The whole week has been productive, yet exhausting physically, mentally, and emotionally lol. But meh, everything is manageable if you put your mind to it ;) I think thats enough of ramblin' for one night. I shall leave you readers at peace now haha thank you for reading!

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